Congratulations—you’re going to be a mom! Whether it’s your first or sixth baby, there are things to consider and plan for:

• Do you have your birth-plan worked out with your family and obstetrician (nurse-midwife)?

• Do you have your suitcase packed (or things organized if you’re having a home-birth)?

• Do you have your emergency contacts in case you go in to labour at a less-than-convenient time?

• Do you have the nursery ready for your baby’s arrival?

• Does your baby have a family?

That last point might seem odd, but inasmuch as we plan with such detail about every other aspect of our newborn’s life, sometimes we overlook the most basic thing: your baby needs a family. I’m not going to delve in to the political hot-potato of single moms having kids, I’m simply going to advocate for a family for your baby. If you’re married, this means a husband for you and a daddy for your child.

The goal of parenting is not to simply avoid excessive anxiety, but it is to create a world of confidence by what we do with each other as much as what we avoid doing. Weak marriages do not build strong families, nor do they infuse the hearts of children with confidence and security. And isn’t that last phrase what we want most for our babies? The best years of parenting flow out of the best years of a marriage. Protect your relationship and you’ll raise happy, healthy children as a result.

Too often when a child enters a family (please note that you and your husband ARE a family even before you have children!), the marriage is set to the back-burner of the stove, be it due to exhaustion, lack of extra time, etc. The parents leave their first love: each other. Isn’t that the reason you married and decided to have children in the first place?

So before you begin parenting this new little one who will be so precious to you and your family, take some time to consider the state of your marriage. If you need to work on it, start now: your baby will sense and respond to stress in your home and your body more than you might realize. You won’t want to have your precious bundle of joy starting out life stressed, so do what you can now to eliminate that and keep your relationship with your husband on the front-burner. You won’t regret it!